Mother's Day pictures. May 2009.

My two little angels. :) I love my twinners!

Wow! So much has changed since my last blog. :)

Things have been going pretty well for us lately. We've had our struggles with Derek losing his job and finding out that we are pregnant with twins, but all things considered we've been extremely blessed. My testimony of tithing has grown so much in these past few months. Since being married we've always paid an honest tithe, but hadn't really experienced the blessings (or rather seen the blessings) until Derek lost his job. His pay was decreased down to less then half and yet amazingly we are able to pay our bills. We were blessed with his part-time job working at a jewelry store. His former bishop is the owner and that's been a blessing. I've seen Derek grow a lot since working there. While he was working at Winger's he was surrounded by vulgar employees, and you can see a difference in his language and spirituality since being at the jewelry store. :) I'm very grateful for these changes. Our relationship has always seemed to be a roller coaster, but things are a lot better now since having lost his job. I'm sure a lot of it has to do with not being in that environment anymore. His schedule has allowed for him to go back to school now. He's going to school full-time right now and working part-time. He has a couple of classes that he needs to take this summer and then he'll be able to hopefully start the LPN or RN program this fall. Keep your fingers crossed for us! :) He's still the first counselor in the Elders Quorum presidency. That does take a bit of his time throughout the week.

I've just been trying to slowly get things ready for the babies. I'm going crazy because I want to get a lot of cleaning done (which is MUCH needed right now), and I feel like everything I do is undone within a matter of hours from the boys (Derek included). I'm still trying to figure out why it seems that the mother is the only one that is able to clean. If you can explain that for me I'd appreciate it. lol It takes a lot out of me to do simple things like dishes, sweeping, laundry, etc and then when I do those things during the day at night I'm really dragging and need to lay down. I've been working with the boys and making them keep their room clean. That's a big relief cause it's one less mess that I have to see. :) It's hard for me to get around now. I dread going to the grocery store now. With Derek's schedule (work, school, church, studying) I end up having to take one or both of the boys with me and it's just getting way too hard now. I have a hard enough time walking and then having to worry about those little turkeys makes it even more difficult. Coby thinks he needs EVERYTHING while we are in the store. I'm constantly telling him we don't need that put it back! lol Shopaholic! :)

Coby is a good kid. He has his struggles because I think he is really ADHD, but he doesn't mean to be crazy. He just can't control it sometimes. I limit his sugar intake which does seem to help. He loves going to preschool. Today they learned about Hawaii. He was excited because his teacher brought him back a necklace from Hawaii that had a shark tooth on it. He loves to have stories read to him. He loves learning about Christ and the church. He's been learning about Joseph Smith and it just amazes me how much information he is able to retain. I'm his primary teacher and that's been an experience. lol I love him to death but I think maybe he'd do better with someone that wasn't his mother. He'd be able to focus more and not be all over my lap. His favorite book is a story about Jonah. I read him the story once and then he asked me to read it again to him and I said..nah how about you tell me the story. He turned each page and explained to me what was going on in each picture. It was amazing! Then he insisted on going and teaching Grandma and Grandpa about Jonah. It was sooo cute. We've read that story many times since then but it remains one of his favorites. I just love that boy.

Tucker has been having some struggles lately. He's gotten into a nasty habit of whinning. I was watching Nanny 911 today during nap time and the kids had a problem with whinning so I'm going to use her techniques and hope and pray that it works. lol I can't tolerate whiners. I just want to smack him when he acts like that. He loves to help me with everything. He's a good helper. He wakes up early every morning and comes in and tells me it's not bed time anymore (at 6 AM). I'm like oh yes it is! Go away! lol Normally we'll just get him his breakfast and turn on cartoons and he's set for an hour or so. :) I've started working with him to get him potty trained. He was doing really well and then I got really sick and slacked off...and now he doesn't really want to be potty trained. :( I'm just going to have to really work hard with him because there is no way we will be able to afford 3 in diapers. He's got such a cute personality when he isn't in his "moods". He makes the cutest expressions. I just love to snuggle him. We play a kissing game where I'll kiss them all over their faces and then they say...."No more kisses til tomorrow!"...and then I'll kiss them more and they just giggle. It's cute. If they start kissing me I'll say the same thing to them and they just giggle and do it more...and gang up on me. It's really funny. If you ask Tucker his name he'll tell you his name is Tuck Tuck Thailand or Buster Buster. lol It's kind of funny. Tuck Tuck Thailand is what uncle Dean started calling him from birth and he thinks it's his real name. lol

The twins are doing great. They are both measuring out to be the size of a normal single baby. It's great for them and not so great for me. :) It feels like I've got a bunch of snakes in my stomach. It's really hard to walk because of the pressure. I waddle when I do walk and can't walk far at all. I've been wanting to take a trip down to visit Davi and Carly in Provo, but I can't make the trips anymore. We went the Monday after his birthday and when I got out of the car it really hurt to walk, so I've decided no more trips that take longer then 15 min's. We'll have to have them up here for dinner or something soon. :) My doctor said that she's not going to let me go past 38 weeks, so if they aren't here by then she'll do a c-section and get them out. She said it's really common for them to be born at 35 weeks. I think I'll be able to go past 35 weeks because I haven't experienced any complications. My friend was put on bed rest at 20 weeks. She is a lot smaller then I am and I'm sure that had something to do with it. She was able to carry her twins until 36 weeks. We've decided on Chloe for the girls name and it looks like the boy will be named Noah. When I was at the temple when Carly went through for the first time I scanned the scriptures to see if there was a name that would pop out at me...and the two names that came to me were Noah and Moses. I really don't like the name Moses at all...esp considering the family joke with "Dang that Moses" from when Moses B slammed little Davi into the wall at church. Noah isn't a name I would've chosen either, but it's grown a lot on me. I feel like his name is Noah. Derek wanted the name Joseph Enoch. That's too much for me. I don't like that at all. Joseph is one of my favorite boy names, but it just doesn't feel right. Derek has been saying that his name will more then likely be Noah. :) He suggested Noah Porter Sandberg. I think that sounds cute. We'll see what happens. :)

Well I think I've blogged enough now. Much love to you all!

Looking for the rainbow....

Once again it's been a VERY long time since I posted a blog. Sorry! I'm not very good at this. :o) I'll start with an update on the boys and then work my way up (youngest to oldest). Tucker is a very typical 2-year-old. lol Some of his favorite sayings are, "Go away!", "Leave me alone!", "Coby did it", lol "I love you more!", and "I can do it all by myself". Tucker speaks VERY well for a little tyke. I can't get him to shut up when we are home...lol He loves to help me with "everything" (I'm still developing my patience's....lol). He loves to tackle his older brother. He has a little attitude for SURE. lol He's sooo cute. He loves saying his prayers. We love our little Lucky ducky. lol My Coby Clayton is such a mommas boy. I just love him to pieces. Coby starts pre-school on September 2nd. He has made it VERY clear that he does NOT want to go to school! I don't really want him to start yet either, but grandma thinks it's a good idea for him, so we will give it a month and see what will happen. If he is very persistent about not liking it then I'll withdraw him and try it again next year. Coby has learned that Jesus was baptised in the river Jordan, and was baptised by John the Baptist. He learned it from a primary song, and loves to just share that information with us. It's SO cute! lol Coby and Tucker are the best of friends and also the worst of friends at the same time. lol They can be giving each other loves one minute and then be trying to scalp each other the next minute. :op Coby was totally potty trained and now for some reason he's reversed it. AHHHHH! I still love my little snuggle bug! As for me, I was diagnosed with a muscle disease a few weeks ago. My muscles are deteriorating. It's not like MS or anything like that. My muscles are breaking down and then being filtered through my kidneys. It causes a lot of fatigue, muscle pains, etc. On a positive note, I just got back from a Body Shop at Home convention which was FABULOUS, and I've decided to do something with it for once. lol We have launched some REALLY AWESOME new lines so please check out my site at www.thebodyshopathome.com/web/torisandberg . We have a new baby line (my friend uses it on her baby and it's just WONDERFUL!), a new mineral make-up line (Chase Aston does make-up for TONS of well known stars and super models and he only uses the body shop make-up), and a new Well being product line (I really recommend the deep sleep pillow mist works GREAT!). I absolutely love working for a company that has such amazing ethics. They started a human trafficking campaign in England this year, and next year they will launch it here in the US. I'm SOOOOOOOOOO happy about that because it's an issue that really touches my heart. I invite you all to use Body Shop products because it truly is an amazing company and we do amazing things for our world. :) Thanks for all the support! On to Derek now, well...he was fired about 2 Saturday's ago from Winger's. It was a shock because his boss emailed him to notify him that he no longer had a job. Things are going to be pretty rocky for us for awhile, but I know that God will provide a way for us if we have faith. We could definitely use some extra prayers. I don't understand how people are able to get state help so quickly and easily because it just doesn't seem to happen like that for us. They keep telling me to wait 2-3 weeks before applying for certain things because they use the last 30 days of wages to figure things out. Ahem, why would you do that if you are currently without a job???? Does that make sense to anyone cause I'm not seeing the logic behind this. No job=no job to me so what does the last 30 days have to do with anything? It's pretty retarded. Derek starts school next month for his CNA course. I wish he would've done it a year ago when he first decided to do this, but I guess better late then never. He wants to go on to become an RN and then he'll get his master's in nursing. I think that with all the trials we've been going through lately surprisingly now we seem to be pulling closer together instead of apart. I've been carrying a lot of stress on my back but I'm realizing that I need to give my burdens over to Heavenly Father and trust that he will help guide us through this. :o) So yeah, lol we have a crazy life right now, but I know that there will be a rainbow after the storm... (I'll just keep looking out my window til I see it).

Much love to you all!

It's been a LONG time....

I think the last blog I posted on here was back in April, so a lot has happened since then. Sorry! :) Well, back March or April I was diagnosed with Grave's disease, it's an autoimmune disease. For some reason autoimmune disease's tend to run strongly in our family. When I first learned that I possibly had Grave's disease it really freaked me out. I had never heard of it before and the name scared the crap out of me. :) No worries though the name "Grave's" is named after it's founder. :) Some of the side effects are bulging eyes (more common with smokers), tachycardia (fast heart rate), difficulty getting pregnant, anxiety's, paranoia, chronic diarrhea (I just assumed it was from my gallbladder being removed), tremors, short term paralysis, shortness of breath, heart disease, etc. I had the majority of those symptoms (no bulging eyes or heart disease). There were a few treatment options available for me drug therapy, radiation, or surgery to remove my thyroid. Your thyroid levels are supposed to be within 10-12, mine the first day was at 68 and the second day was at 98. Very HIGH! The Rad tech's seemed really concerned and kept stressing the importance of getting into my doctor as soon as possible to go over my treatment plan. At first I decided to do the drug therapy, and then after I took the first pill everything just felt wrong. I called my doctor and switched to radiation. I had to wait 1 or 2 weeks because I had taken one of the pills. I did the radiation and had to stay away from my boys for at least a week (although I've been radioactive much longer then a week). One thing that wasn't mentioned to me was how much your throat hurts after doing the radiation. I didn't want to eat or drink for the first few days. I couldn't get comfortable because my throat hurt sooooooooo much. It only lasted about 4 days I think. I was put on a beta-blocker before the radiation to help control my heart rate and tremors. So the last week of May I went in and had some blood work done. They said that my TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) still wasn't producing hormone yet, so they put me on some other medication. I hate it because I feel really antsy and high strung. I wake up pretty much every morning around 2:30 AM and can't get back to sleep until it's almost time to wake up. Grrrrrrrr! I was first told that I wouldn't be able to get pregnant or have a normal baby (most likely would've been born retarded), and then when I met with my Endocrine (thyroid) doctor she said that you'll still be able to get pregnant in the future just don't do it anytime soon (at least 6 months). That was great news for us. :) They want you to wait at least 6 months before getting pregnant because a lot of times when you've got the grave's disease and had the radiation you're baby could very likely be born without a thyroid and that would cause severe problems for the baby. The thyroid is what controls your metabolism, heart rate, etc. My big reason for opting to do the radiation was that sometimes it can take years to regulate your thyroid using the drug therapy which would be more risky if I wanted to have more kids in the future which I do. With the radiation I know that if I wanted to get pregnant in a year I can....I'm not sure how easy it will be to get pregnant. We hadn't used any birth control after we had Tucker and he's 2 and we only got pregnant once last year but I miscarried early in the pregnancy (associated with Grave's disease which I found out later). I'm excited because that means we'll still be able to have our little Chloe, someday...lol :)

"No one is so lost that angels can't find them!"

My heart aches for the family in South Salt Lake City that lost their daughter yesterday. I am so angry. I think that our court system sucks. I'm all about not giving criminals rights. With all of the sexual and physcial abuse that goes on behind doors I'm ready for the government to put cameras in our homes. I really am. I know that many people out there don't feel the same way, but think about it, if we did....how many children would be spared? I can't seperate myself from the children...and if it came to saving just one child by doing this, I'm 100% for it. My heart is sooo broken thinking about what lead up to Suna Moo's final hours and for her family.... I honestly feel that sex offenders should be locked up in a facility like alka tras (sp), and literally throw away the key! Unfortunately, we have way too many liberals out there and that would never happen. It's a shame that we can't do anything to protect our babies. They aren't even safe in their own beds. One day I'm going to get into some form of law enforcement and start making some changes. I'm 100% pro death penalty. It should be painful and intense. All of those children that have died at the hands of these sick ______'s died from intense unimaginable pain...where is the justice???? There isn't. I just want our babies protected...and that will never happen with the way society is. Here we are over seas fighting a never ending war, and yet monsters roam freely in our own country. Take the money and forces and change ours!! I was just recently diagnosed with Grave's disease, it's an autoimune disease. It makes it very difficult to have children, and if I did they would more then likely be born retarded. It also includes many other health factors. At first I was really sad because I've always wanted 5 children, and now I'm thinking it's a blessing. Now I can really help make a difference for the children in the world. Once my boys are a little older I'm going to get envolved in Foster Care, and start working with the children one on one....what a blessing. :) I know that I'll have my 5 children it's just not going to be the way I originally thought. :) My P. Blessing mentions that I have this Christ-like love that will allow me to help those that rarely experience love.....it didn't really make sense to me before and now it's soo clear....it's our children in the world. The ones that have been abused and unloved! :)*** I pray that H.F will bless me with the tools that I need to be able to reach out to as many children as I can. They are my heart and soul. Yesterday a couple of ladies posted a sign on poster board that says: "No one is so lost that angels can't find them " how amazing and profound that is. :) It brought me such relief when I read that. That's been one of the hardest things for me to deal with is the knowing that they are alone, but they aren't...they never are. :)** I was thinking about little Suna Moo yesterday around 6 something, and I just got covered in goose bumps, I knew she was dead. I tried to use my energy to see where she was, but I couldn't see anything. When Elizabeth Smart went missing I did that with her, and I saw lots of sage brush, and rocks.....I found out months later that her captor had her trapped behind her yard and that's what was around them. I'm not saying I'm a psychic, but I know that I've been blessed with certain gifts that allow me to feel energies, and to know if someone is bad, etc. Anyways, I can't figure out how to post a song on here, but please listen to the song Lost by Michael Buble. I listen to it over and over.


Love ya,

Tori